3 Steps to Overcome Any Challenge
Can you think of an event in your life that you would describe as “negative”? If so, you already have more disadvantages than advantages in your mind.
Now let’s do something to change that…
Get a pen and paper and write down answers to the questions below. Write until you are able to discover an EQUAL number of benefits and drawbacks associated with this experience.
Once you can clearly see that there are equal benefits and drawbacks, you become fully able to appreciate the experience, rather than judging it as only one-sided. At this point you’re no longer attached to the experience, and the only thing left to say is “Thank God” for the experience. It’s in these moments that you discover your greatness.
HINT: In searching for answers, look at each part of your life–physical, mental, spiritual, financial, vocational, family, and social.
- STEP 1: What are some of the benefits of your challenge to both you and others?
- STEP 2: What would be some of the disadvantages to you and others if you did NOT have this challenge?
- STEP 3: Let’s pretend things turned out the way you had wished; what would be the disadvantages to you and to others?
Life’s challenges can be tough, real tough… Sometimes it can feel as if there’s no hope–that no one could possibly understand what you’re going through. While some of life’s challenges are certainly a lot tougher than others, all of these challenges are tests that have one thing in common. It is not the event but the EMOTIONS we associate with it that are the issue.
The divorce, the job loss, the illness, the cheating partner aren’t the real challenge. They are the result of an emotional pattern. The perceived challenge is rooted in emotion. We’re not depressed because of the job loss or divorce. We’re depressed because we feel we are failures, because we feel alone, because we don’t see that there are just as many benefits as there are drawbacks to the so-called “negative” event.
So we get into a pattern of trying the wrong solution to solve the wrong problem… and then feel we’ve failed when the wrong solution doesn’t work! Emotions will repeat over and over until they are brought into balance.
What is meant by balance?
Let’s say we are devastated following a divorce. What are some of the feelings we are experiencing? We feel loss, like a failure, like a failed parent… These feelings will go on and on until we can see how we EQUALLY gained from the divorce and how the divorce itself was also a success. Have you ever heard the expression, “Some day we will all look back on this and laugh”? Depending upon how fast we allow ourselves to find the balance in our challenge, WE determine how fast that day of laughter arrives.
Have you been taught specifically how to find the blessings in your challenge? Were you trained to look at each area of life and see the benefits to your challenge? Don’t get me wrong; it can be hard, real hard to stop and force yourself to see the other side.The alternative is to repeat this emotional pattern for months, years, or even decades!
By digging deep and discovering the service of your challenge to your self and others; by discovering how if this great challenge did NOT happen there would be EQUAL disadvantages; by coming to presence and becoming thankful for how your life is in this very moment, you can conquer your challenge today. With each new challenge you conquer comes appreciation for the underlying order that exists. And with appreciation comes growth.
These are the repeatable action steps you can do over and over each time you face a new challenge. The purpose of these exercises is to move past any judgements that your life would somehow be better had you not experienced this challenge. The event “is.” It’s neither more “good” nor “bad.” Balancing our emotions related to the challenge gives us a glimpse of the “big picture” so that we stop trying to fix what ain’t broken in the first place, and we become a lot more likely to create what we’d love.
Yes, the grass always seems greener on the other side. But as with anything, practice makes perfect. The faster you become able to recognize and balance your emotions, the faster you will get back to your place of creating and manifesting the life you’d love.
John Castagnini is a poet, philosopher, best selling author and the creator of www.thankgodi.com. John shares how to discover the omnipresent perfection that transcends our daily “problems” through his Power of Perfection Series. You can find out more about John at www.johncastagnini.com.